what i meant

An unsent message to Emil

Written anonymously and never sent. More notes from the wall are below.

To Emil,

I’d just like to know how you actually feel about me. I mean, you went behind my back and said you didn’t care about me and didn’t want to have anything to do with me just days after I dedicated you a bday letter, let you vent to me and you told me you really appreciated me so… it’s just a little confusing. I don’t even hate you for it or anything I just want to know.  To be 100% honest, I liked you. There’s something about you I guess. But I also resented you cause you often hurt the people who support you (not just me btw). I’m speaking in the past tense because I don’t resent you anymore. I don’t really know about the liking part.  It would be cool if we could talk about it someday. Don’t worry, you don’t have to apologize, you’ve done that a lot before (although it would be nice).

— Anonymous

49 min. ago · SD 0

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    To Colin ig,

    thanks for being the first guy i liked that i couldnt be actually mean to. your just too cool for that ig

    — Anonymous

    27 min. ago 0

    To Emil,

    I’d just like to know how you actually feel about me. I mean, you went behind my back and said you didn’t care about me and didn’t want to have anything to do with me just days after I dedicated you a bday letter, let you vent to me and you told me you really appreciated me so… it’s just a little confusing. I don’t even hate you for it or anything I just want to know.  To be 100% honest, I liked you. There’s something about you I guess. But I also resented you cause you often hurt the people…

    — Anonymous

    49 min. ago · SD 0

    To Silas, Ex

    i saw you at the party btw. i'm sorry i ignored you, i'm so sorry for everything. i am just so scared and i miss you so much. i miss what we had. it meant so much to me, and i hope it meant something to you too. if you ever call, i'll always answer. and if you ever want to try again i'll try my best. and i do truly hope she makes you happy. we weren't perfect, but we were something, weren't we? i can't stand the thought that you hate me, please don't hate me. i could never, ever hate you. i'm…

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    To Ray, Ex

    Halloween has come & gone, it’s been weeks since the break up…I’m doing better mentally with the help of our friends & the family I’m closet too. After talking with our friend who u confessed to first over when u first had a crush on me before we dated, I realize you probably won’t change…and will repeat this again & again. I miss u but I don’t think I could date u again even if u did come back into my life…u hurt me so much & even if u do realize what u did & how it was wrong alongside how…

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    To Whoever,

    Hi, i just needed to spill my heart out or something. I don't like anything about myself. Literally nothing. Yeah I like my friends and family or people I care about. Obviously. But at the same time I just get so upset that I cry every night. I hate it. I make these pretend fights with my best friend but at the same time I'm scared. I'm scared to actually hurt my feelings or I feel bad about what I say. But at the end of the day, I feel like they take it as a joke. Even if I apologize or they…

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    To caden, Crush

    hey, this might be weird, but i just wanted to get this off my mind. i like u. like genuinely, really like u. and i've liked u for a while now. i know you've had some horrible experiences with girls before, and i know a lot of them only seemed interested in what they could get from u instead of actually seeing u for who u are. i think that's part of why i was so scared to tell u this. i never wanted u to think i'm like that.i think one of the reasons i like u is because i genuinely enjoy being…

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    Baka baka baka

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    No nut November!

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    To A,

    Even though you’re not gone I still miss you. I know everything is fine but it feels off. I miss hearing you say those 8 letters with a sigh of relief, I miss hearing your laugh, I miss hearing your awful singing even though you insist it’s good (it’s terrible) but it’s all I wanna hear now. I remember when you told me to smile one more time so that you can imprint the picture into your memory before you sleep. You’ve blessed me with words as beautiful as your character. Throughout the day I…

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    To Huang, Ex

    I really do loved you, but the distance between us become the wall that we both can't climb over, what we have is just a phone and two heart that are in loved. I am sorry, if I have a chance, I will definitely meet you in Taiwan, and tell you I have never forgotten you.

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    To Melisa, Friend

    I remember introducing u to bts, i was listening to run and i need u and it made me think of those times. You’ll always be special to me even though we don’t speak anymore, hopefully one day, we’ll have that beautiful friendship we once had. I can only hope, pray and wish.

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    To Mason, Sibling

    everytime its july 15th I think of you and how you almost commited. I hope your girlfriend makes you feel better big brother i luv you ❤️

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    11 hr. ago 2

    An Lara S., 18, Ex

    hey lara, immer denke ich, ich hätte so viel zu sagen, doch in dem moment, in dem ich die möglichkeit dazu bekomme, fehlen mir die worte. ich wollte immer nur, dass du glücklich bist. ich wollte nie unfair zu dir sein oder deinen frieden stören. du hast recht, ich hätte euch in ruhe lassen können, aber meine liebe zu dir hat es mir damals schwer gemacht, loszulassen. ich hoffe wirklich von herzen, dass ihr glücklich seid. alles, was ich jemals wollte, war, dass du glücklich bist, lara. auch…

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    11 hr. ago 11

    Para alguém, 17,

    O suposto fim do mundo está perto eu não fiz nada. Nem mesmo realmente me arrepender pelo que fiz.

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    11 hr. ago 0

    To Gio R., 16, Friend

    I mean I love you. You've always been here for me and I love you platonically. Thank you for staying and for never leaving. Thank you for putting up with me. Thank you for being here. Thank you for being you. You are such a sweet person it makes me cry. Because I've never had this type of love. Thank you so much. I love you.

    — Ren N.

    11 hr. ago · No 1